Wednesday, October 31, 2012

girl behind the blog number 4

so i missed doing this last month, but i'm so excited to be doing it again. sorry it's really random. i recorded it late at night after a long day. so please excuse the awkwardness. hope ya'll enjoy. and have a happy halloween tonight dears!

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

sitting in the dark

and not because of hurricane sandy. i'll be very surprised if she makes it to kansas city. tonight for who knows how long, i just sat on my dining room floor in the dark, looking out the window at the moon. the only light was the reflection of the moon and my pumpkin. (i carved one for the first time in ages) it was nice to just be able to sit there and think. about nothing in particular. just thinking and talking to God. very rarely do i take the time to sit and be still in silence and dark anymore.

it used to be a nightly thing for me to go outside during the summer, lay in the grass, look at the stars and talk to God about my day and the issues i saw. but i'm a pansy in the cold, so it would stop sometime in the fall when i decided it was too cold. then my summer nights got busy with school and work and small group, and i didn't want to be the weirdo who lays in their yard at 1 am and is completely sober. so i stopped going outside. i still talk to God about my day, and issues i have or my friends have, or the world has. i write in my journal. i recently even started writing down my prayers. but even then, i can still get distracted.

sunday, my church had their family fun night at red barn farm. it is a great place with lots of great memories for me. (we went on field trips there a lot in elementary school, and i even milked a cow there) the scenery is amazing (what else would you expect from a farm) and i love being able to forget about the city for a while. (i just sang piano man "and forget about life for a while" great song)

how is this not fantastic

looking at the barn from the top of the hill


i have an odd thing for windmills. 

but even in this amazing and tranquil scenery, it was easy to get distracted. 

there were things to do, (grace and her sweet son as they were coming in)

kids to keep an eye on, (little man checking out the goats)
animals to see, (o.e., the one eared horse)
food to eat, 
(shelley and her pumpkin)
(bubba checking out his pumpkin)
(big bubba finding the perfect face to put on)
pumpkins to decorate, 

s'mores to make, marshmallows to torch for said s'mores (yes i catch my marshmallows are fire and let them burn for a bit. i'm too impatient for the fire to slowly toast them)
with so much to do, it was difficult to find time to slow down and take in the amazing picture God painted. i can look back at the pictures, and i can even go back whenever i have the time to, but it's not the same as taking the time then and there, with the crazy kids all around me, and just soak it in. 
why is it so difficult to do things like that in today's society?

on another note, i'm super excited tomorrow is halloween! sunday, i got a pumpkin from the red barn farm, and so last night i gutted it and chose my design to carve, and this afternoon i carved my dalek pumpkin. if you follow me on istagram, you've seen basically the whole process. this is the first time i've carved a pumpkin since high school, so the fact that it turned out as nice as it did is a huge deal to me. i love doctor who, and thought a dalek would be more fitting for me to do than an owl. plus the daleks are my favorite enemy of the doctor. (i'm not sure why, but they are)


so i forgot how think a pumpkins skin is, and it took forever to even get the top off. 
got it. 

so actually pulling the guts out is one of my favorite parts of carving a pumpkin. 

i really wanted to roast the seeds, but mom said to throw them out instead


my dalek all traced on there. 
i kinda chose the grody side of the pumpkin. not sure why
all lit up tonight
the moon was really bright

my view tonight. 

so i talked to my friend hilary today. on thursday and tuesday she is going to be mentoring me in photography. i even get to do a photo shoot with her adorable baby son. i'm so excited for this! she's a great woman and friend, and i'm so stoked to have her mentor me. she even told me i will be the first person she is doing this for, which makes it all the more exciting! such a blessing to know her and be able to do this with her. and this will definitely come in handy when i do my friends engagement pictures.  

Thursday, October 25, 2012

week of opportunities

so last night i led small group. it went really well and i'm so glad i had this opportunity. it was just 4 of us, so that kinda helped calm my nerves. it was so sweet of shelley to open up her home to us. she has such a cute little home. after group, we got a tour of it, and were able to stay and talk for a long it. it was great to get to know them more. these girls are becoming good friends of mine. i'm trying to be intentional of hanging out with them more than just at group. i met with ashley, the normal leader, on tuesday night, and talked to her about jeanette and i apprenticing her next session and starting co-leading in the summer. i am so excited for this journey! it's been on my heart for a while now, and i'm excited to be putting it into action.

when i got home last night, i looked at the mail i had on my bed, and i got my certificate from the board of pharmacy saying i'm officially registered to work in a pharmacy in the state of missouri! i was so excited to see it. this is super exciting for me since hopefully i can get a job as a tech, and actually work at what i'm going to school for.

then this afternoon i got a text from my childhood best friend asking if i was still into photography. she then asked if i wanted to do her engagement pictures. i was so excited that she asked me this. this will be my first time actually to photograph someone, not just bringing my camera with me and taking random pictures. she is thinking around thanksgiving time and just going to a park for the pictures. so at least it gives me some time to meet up with some photographer friends and get some tips and ideas.

on a not opportunistic note, friday is trunk 'n treat at work, and i'm excited to work it and wear my costume. i am curious how many parents will get it. (if you follow me on instagram you've already seen it) i love halloween and being able to dress up. and my costume is so comfortable, i may wear more than once haha. ashley said i could wear it to small group.

i also want to put some prayer requests up on here. my best friend told me last night her fiance's grandpa has meningitis. the doctors said they caught it in time and he should be okay, but i still want to pray for him and his family. also her aunt has cancer in her blood, and the doctors haven't given her very long. and lastly, a family friend passed away this week. his funeral is saturday and his mother has only one child left. this will be the third adult child she has had to bury, and i just want to pray for her to have strength during all of this. if you could help pray in these situations, it would mean so much to everyone involved.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

10 random facts about me

1. i hate getting my hair cut. i will tend to avoid it at all. i'm trying to grow it out and got it trimmed today for the first time since february. it would have been longer but i also wanted it colored so i did both.

2. i am obsessed with british shows. i spent almost my whole weekend watching doctor who, sherlock, and torchwood. i am beginning to think the british accent is normal. and i love it!

3. i have dimples in my shoulders. and a freckle on the arch of my right foot.

4. i still love to dress up for halloween every year. (i'm being daria this year, pretty stoked)

5. i watch golden girls almost every night. or the big bang theory. they make me happy

6. i am trying to shadow some friends and learn some tricks and tips for photography and photo editing. i mess around with it, but would like to figure out more of what i'm actually trying to do haha.

7. i dye my hair a lot. i've stopped using a box though, and have decided it's better for me to just cough up the money every now and then to get it done correctly.

8. i claim a lot of the kids from work as my own. a lot of them i have been watching since they were babies.

9. i have crappy vision, but i actually enjoy wearing my glasses. i can't wait to get to heaven and have good eyesight though.

10. no matter what mood i'm in, i love rocking out to bon jovi or pat benetar.

Saturday, October 20, 2012

eek!! =D

so this past week has be spent working, trying to catch up on homework, and house/dog sitting for my friend while she is back home in california. pretty boring, i know, but her dogs are kinda cute. also, i got my first love club package today! so excited for that one =D

but i made a big decision at small group wednesday. our fearless leader will be having parent teacher conferences that night, so we will be meeting at another girls house, and i volunteered to lead the group. i'm actually super nervous about this but also pretty excited. she had kind of brought it up a week or two ago when we had dinner together. her and her husband will be moving soon for his schooling, and she is looking for someone to apprentice her and take over before she leaves. as we continued talking about it, she asked if i wanted to do it. i told her i would think about it, and then as she looked around her living room for a volunteer, i said i would do it this week. something i was not really expecting to come out of my mouth.

as i've sat in rose's living room watching doctor who and thinking more about this upcoming opportunity, i've thought, what if God wants me to be a leader for this group. i've seen it go from bre to ashley, and i've seen so many faces come and leave. i've been in this group for a bit over 2 years. it was the first small group i joined, and i'm not ready to leave my community of 10-12 wonderful young ladies. i was talking to one of the girls the other day, and she talked about us both apprenticing and co-leading in the summer session. i thought, and still think, it's a great idea. i would love to be able to have her do it with me. i guess it will be something we talk about more at dinner tonight.

i'm super excited for this opportunity and to see when it leads. when i told my mom about it that evening, she said she was excited for me. it's kind of ironic that both of my parents help as sunday school teachers, and after 22 and a half years with them, i will be leading a small group. i can't wait to see how it goes and share with ya'll in a few days! hope ya'll are having a great saturday and a great weekend!!

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

grandpa's birthday

this weekend was fantastic! my brother and his family from texas was up here this weekend for our grandpa's 80th birthday. if you follow me on instagram then you saw my overload of pictures. they came in thursday night so it was great to get to see them when i was done babysitting. and my sweet niece said i was her sister for most of the weekend.
sweet claire and her bear

claire and grandma at crown center

checking out the lego girl

grandpa and angie talking to griffin



telling steve something

getting ready to go to lego land


checking out what's in lego land



love this face

griffin and ethan

almost as tall as 80 legos


she was trying to sing but got bashful



he decided to start dancing










kansas city in legos

my cousin matthew painting his hand

he's kind of a cheeser, i love it.


friday we met up with my aunt and uncle from california and went to crown center and lego land. that place is great! they have this part where you have a laser tag gun and you have to rescue the princess and save the dragon eggs, and poor little claire was scared in that part. lucky for her dad was there to protect her. i'm not sure griffin even realized what was going on. the rest of it was just a ton of fun stuff for the kids to do. there was one place where you can build something and then push a button and it shakes like it's in an earthquake. griffin was all about pushing the button to make it shake. the last room is called miniland. it had a mini version of the skyline of kc, the stadiums, the speedway, starlight theatre, and even dorothy's house, munchkin land, the emerald city, and the witches castle from wizard of oz. the kids really seemed to enjoy it and the adults for sure had a good time.

friday night my parents and i got to babysit the kids while ethan and kristen went to dinner with some friends. they were so excited to see our cat. (i think she hated me for bringing her inside so they could pet her) griffin tried to use her as a pillow and they were both in her face loving her. we watched lady and the tramp, and claire kept rearranging her blanket and the babydoll mattress. griffin just cuddled with grandma.

talking to uncle joel, way past our bedtime

he was ready to leave

grandpa made the mistake of laying on the floor


playing piano

eating dinner while sissy takes his picture

looking at pictures with grandma

she was a kitty and scaring grandpa. 

saturday we all went to mound city to celebrate grandpa's birthday. he didn't know that we flew ethan and his family up here, so it was a great surprise for him. i think grandma even said it was a dream come true to have the great grandkids all in the house. so it was us, ethan and his family, aunt and uncle from california, aunt and uncle from iowa, and jamie and her little family from chicago. jack and griffin are only about 2 weeks apart so it was so sweet to see them playing together. we had dinner at a little place in down town mound city. it was decorated with bears, deer heads, and long horn skulls around. i thought it was cool. claire even did her "hook 'em horn". we are still working on "rock, chalk, jayhawk". then we went to a park near grandpa's house to get some family pictures. the kids loved the big slides. jack just loved walking around in the leaves. when we got home, julie got out some stickers to decorate pumpkins with. it kept claires attention, but jack was more concerned with sticking them on pop-pop and his dad. griffin was too busy with everything else to do it. claire loved playing with tony. she also gave everyone some mustache stickers.

my grandparents house. so many memories here

greg trying to help griffin put his shoes on. and claire just talking. 

during family pictures i became the camera lady =]

checking out the cars on the road

picture with grandpa and the great grandkids

g-man sitting with me. 

singing happy birthday to grandpa


helping blow out the candles

decorating pumpkins
her finished pumpkin

hey look, there's a piano at great grandpa's house too! with pictures of all the grand kids and great grandkids on it. i think goph called it the holland hall of fame. 


jack giving claire a hug


decorating his pumpkin



sunday was our last full day together. my dad got some new swings for them, so we were able to spend the afternoon outside playing in the back yard. the kids seemed to like running to the fence and the running around the trees near it. griffin also enjoyed climbing up the steps and jumping off to have mom and grandpa catch him. we had dinner at a kinda 50's themed diner, then went to the play place in zona rosa. they loved it there. claire even made a new friend, and did not want to leave her. sadly that night she told me i was her aunt instead of her sister. ethan joked that i got demoted.

trying to catch up with daddy and claire. 



griffin and uncle joel 





dad and his cheesy smile

finally figured out how to climb it himself


grandpa being a zombie

there's a smile behind that binki




"hey look at me up here!"





getting the cookie dough off her hands

precious boy


helping make brownies










yesterday we took them to the airport and she said i can go on the airplane to her house and play with her toys and i can pet darby. (her dog) i'm so ready to go down there in a few weeks and see them again.