it got me feeling like i have not been fully committed to God in all aspects of my life. i feel like i don't shine the light of God when i am at work. i let things make me angry when it is so small in the grand scheme of things. i am not the best steward of my time or money lately. i compare myself to others and get jealous of what they have instead of appreciating what i do have. i haven't been regular in my Bible reading or prayer life.
i keep knowing that i need to work on these issues, i keep acknowledging that i have been leading a "double-life". i play christian on sundays, with certain people and places, but i feel like i play world during the week at work or with other people.
i can't keep saying i need to work on it. i am fully aware of that. i need to talk with someone and become more accountable for these actions. i need to make a daily checklist and keep a list of the things God has given me, rather than focus on what my friends have. i need to block out time in my schedule for Bible reading and prayer life. i need to treat it like any other appointment until it is a regular part of my daily routine. i need help truly becoming who God made me to be, but for that to happen i need to be fully, 100% committed to God. i need to be aware of my actions and thoughts. i will need help with this. i will need people checking with me to make sure i am keeping up. i will need people to be aware enough to call me out, which means i will need to spend enough time and open up with people so they can see it.
i am asking for help. i am asking for my friends near and far to support me, call me out, whatever it takes to keep me accountable. please help me.